MOST RECENT 11+ ANONYMOUS COMMENTS

These are the most recent submissions to the site.

Independent Schools Examinations Board (ISEB) scores

January 8, 2025

My daughter has had very high CAT scores for the last several years. Scores put her in the top stanine (simplified standard score) 9 her average over a 130. When she was immediately rejected from top schools we requested results. We have found that she tested into stanine 6?????

So basically right on average. How on earth is this possible. We were advised to look at top schools. She did not have a bad day. She found the tests challenging but these scores don’t compare to her consistently high CATs, we are at a loss.

Parent

This exam (11plus ) in a small school in rural Wales

January 8, 2025

I was 10 when I passed the exam and went to the secondary school, then moving from grammar to sec modern at the same time. Also various streaming insitu between Welsh speaking, English speaking and various levels of learner.

It was a nightmare which has affected my life. I am in my seventies now and had a successful career but the emotional damage has stayed with me.

I was a really small girl, physically undeveloped at all until third year. I was bullied incessantly and pretty quickly learned not to stick my hand up and answer as the class would torment.. The teachers misunderstanding / not seeing …and then labelled as not trying.. can do better!! No win scenario. Ran away age 13 yrs so then huge parent/family issues.

Returned to Wales following retirement ...Found this site as trying to confirm my age at the time and understand what happened.

I passed the 11+

January 8, 2025

The pressure to succeed felt immense, especially with so many expectations from family and friends. I remember the nights I stayed awake, reviewing practice papers and trying to memorize formulas. It felt like my brain was overloaded, and sometimes I wondered if I could handle it all.

On the day of the exam, the nerves were at an all-time high. I made sure to have a good breakfast, but even that didn’t calm my jittery stomach. Walking into the exam hall, I could feel my heart racing. The atmosphere was tense, and I could see others fidgeting or whispering to each other, which didn’t help my nerves.

Once the exam started, I focused on my breathing and tried to keep my mind clear. I paced myself through the questions, but there were definitely moments of panic when I encountered tricky problems. It’s a blur now, but I remember forcing myself to stay calm and trust in my preparation.

When it was finally over, I felt a huge wave of relief wash over me. I had done my best, and that was all I could ask for. Waiting for the results was tough, but when I received the good news, it made all the stress worthwhile.

Looking back, the experience taught me a lot about resilience, time management, and how to cope with pressure. If you’re going through this process, just remember you’re not alone in feeling stressed, and every bit of effort you put in will pay off in the end.

Kid from Kent

Not passing

December 17, 2024

My grandson did not attain the pass mark of 111 in the Slough consortium test which shocked us because he’s extremely bright and we thought well prepared for it. He’d also had 10 months of private tuition. How can we obtain his test papers to see the marks ourselves?

North Surrey.

Wasted years

November 13, 2024

How you face the future if you fail the 11 Plus depends very much on the support that you have from family and the teaching staff at your junior school. In my case my family had no understanding of the massive depths of depression that I felt, my siblings both passed the the 11 plus, they were praised for passing the 11 Plus. I received no emotional support whatever, my family were incapable of understanding how I felt. All my junior school friends went to the local grammar school, as for my juniors school, all the 11 Plus failures were ignored, we were trash.

Retired one time School Governor Wiltshire

11+ is unnecessary parent guilt and child stress

November 13, 2024

I moved to Kent as an adult and after having kids was shocked to discover the Kent grammar system.

I have 2 bright kids and don’t believe in single sex education and wanted the kids to be able to go to a local school, and receive a comprehensive education suitable for their learning level.

I discovered this isn’t easily possible in my rural area. What to do??!?!

I couldn’t bear to have single sex school, & I really dislike the grammar concept, so I surely must choose comprehensive.

BUT we live in very rural area, my closest local comprehensive school ( & we would be eligible for KCC transport as over 5 miles away) doesn’t have the correct academic level, they don’t even offer the 3 sciences at GCSE ( KCC state double sciences is good enough, but I’m expecting my kids might do science at uni level), and the other subjects don’t have the top achievers, what to do?

I refuse to tutor the kids, kids should be kids playing, not doing extra work.

But the parent guilt when they are sitting the 11+ is sooo high as all their friends have had tutoring for years and mine have only recently looked through the ‘familiarisation’ papers. Am I a bad parent to not have paid for them to be more prepared?

I visit all the nearest schools, grammar & comprehensives and actually like some of the comprehensives, but am told I won’t get in based on distance.

Both kids manage to pass.

Is there any choice other than grammar? as Grammar is selective they will get in even though the schools are further away ( & transport is available as KCC have kept a public bus open just for this route)

A comprehensive that is the closest school to the other side of my village seems to be the perfect answer, a mixed comprehensive with grammar stream.

Excellent! except there is no way to get there, public bus cuts axed this route.

After 2 years of campaigning we have now have rerouted a private bus company to include our village, finally a bus to school, expensive but a solution. My oldest is doing brilliantly now in year 9, my youngest will join in September.

Soo much stress, and it doesn’t have to be this way. If Grammar system didn’t exist, my closest school would have a representational mix of academic levels, and therefore be suitable for my kids, and most likely there would also still be a bus to the other closest school ( that my kid attends) as KCC would be not be paying for a bus route running to the grammar schools as these wouldn’t exist.

My 10 year old’s school class were split down the middle with children who have just failed the 11+ devastated. This system is damaging the confidence and mental health of our children at age 10 years…. Why are we doing this to our kids, it doesn’t have to be this way.

Parent from kent

11+ pass but class fail

October 28, 2024

The only thing I can remember about the test was been told I’d passed and I could go to the grammar school, but the awareness of been different and placing my parents, who had another 5 children and four jobs between them, in an even worse financial situation than they were already in was too much for a child my age to justify. I couldn’t comprehend the level of opportunity and could only equate it to thinking I was saying I was better than others if I went, so when the time came I went to the local secondary school to be like my brothers and sisters.

Everyone’s lives turn on particular events, I don’t think I became a worse member of society for not going, I didn’t become a delinquent or a criminal, I’ve worked since 16, own home, family etc. but I still question whether it is a system that placed such a burden on a child, the nature of the child or the nature of the adult they became, that is to blame for that personal guilt you feel from a seemingly lost opportunity?

Yorkshire

Dreadful system

October 21, 2024

Kent Test results come out tomorrow, so I don’t know yet whether my daughter has been ‘deemed suitable for grammar school’, but I do know that the fear and anxiety that has been building inside her as we approach results day is terrible for her mental health. I know she will succeed and be happy in any school, but she is not able to see that at the moment. She will be crushed if she has not passed the required mark for her preferred school. I will just be glad that it’s over.

Parent from Kent

Community tensions

October 21, 2024

The 11+ system is a toxic open wound in the small town in Kent where I live. Everyone knows its indefensible, yet the system persists, concentrating privilege and resources in the grammar school as opposed to the non grammar school in the town. There is antagonism between the schools and friends and family are broken up every year. I have two kids at the grammar school so I suppose I’ve benefited from the system yet I would have much rather had a good school that everyone can access.

Parent from Kent

Elitist process

October 21, 2024

My son just received his results and did not pass. During year 5, his school told us they are “not allowed” to talk about the 11+ test, and do not prepare children for it in school. His teacher advised us to get the revision books and work through the reasoning questions. He did not have a tutor. It feels really unfair that some bright children are missing out on places at grammar schools due to some schools preparing children and others not, and some parents being able to afford tutors. We had no idea about the 11+ and how early some people put tutors in place.

I wish I had not put my son forward for the test, as it feels like was already at a disadvantage and now he feels disappointed in himself. It is an elitist process.

Kent parent

Very sad day - not sure what my son is feeling now

October 21, 2024

My son missed out by 8 points for the Kent grammar test, he’s absolutely devastated and trying to hide his disappointment by being funny. I am trying to focus on the positives, that he did well but he’ll do well whichever school he goes to.

We were so convinced he would pass, but weren’t prepared for this.

All I wanted to do is hug him but he pushed me away. Writing this just makes me cry.

Thank you for this forum.

Mum outside Bexley and Kent

How is this unfair test still allowed ?

October 21, 2024

My state educated primary school lovely 10 year old child sat the Kent Test this year alongside lifelong friends and classmates.

All tutored (because Kent has a well established unavoidable tutoring industry.)

Competing against Private-school children who have access to Atom learning in school, are taught exam technique in school, in addition to having external tutoring, while state schools are not allowed to offer any help or support to the children on the 11+ at all.

Some I am told take the test despite never having any intention of going to a state grammar – practice for the ISEB tests apparently – So their high marks skew the playing field for the State educated kids with only state school secondary options.

There is a high proportion of privately educated children more than likely taking the Kent Test this year due to VAT rises.

Some of my child’s friends just passed the test by a few marks. My child ‘failed’ the test by a few marks.

An arbitrary ‘pass’ line of who is deemed suitable for grammar school seperating years of friendships and academically very similar children.

My child is now distraught. Confidence broken. Bereft at friendships moving away. Distrusting of the education system.

How is this a way to treat 10 year old young minds who are eager to learn, love school and from one day to the next become very sad little people.

The fact is not lost on me that in 5 or 6 years time they will sit identical GCSE exams.

What is the point of separation at this age?

Luck and chance play a part in those scraping ‘passes’ – guessing correctly numerous answers while others may leave answers blank. That is exam technique – not a sign of academic ability.

This test needs to be abolished. It is not a level or fair playing field and no-one knows the rules they need to play to game the system

I’ll go back to my broken child now and pick up the pieces and build his confidence back up to re-enter this ridiculous kent education system.

I am beyond angry at this system.

Where is the compassion for our children ?

Parent from Kent

My son has passed the 11 plus but I still feel like I failed

October 21, 2024

We were so happy for him when he passed with the qualifying score just above the cut off mark. But then he found out that all of his friends scored significantly higher and are pretty much guaranteed a place at the grammar school, whilst his score is too low to have a chance.

Now I feel like we have failed because everyone tutored intensively and we didn’t. And this is the problem with the eleven plus. It’s all about how much tutoring a child has. We took the test in the spirit it was meant in, we did a few practice papers at home the summer before the test. But of course, whilst we didn’t tutor, other parents did. I’m proud of my son for doing this test and passing it off his own accord.

Even though I’m glad we didn’t tutor him, and that instead of stressing him out with additional tutoring after school and in the holidays, instead did sports, arts, creative projects, we went travelling, camping, hiking, to music festivals, spending time with friends and family. And yet. The 11 plus system is making me feel like a failure for not trying harder as a parent, getting a tutor and giving him the same opportunity as his friends did.

I know that none of this matters in the long run. But I can’t shake off the feeling that everyone else ‘played the game’ and because we didn’t, my son will miss out on an opportunity thar his friends will have.

Parent

heart broken but hopeful

October 16, 2024

We received the results last Friday, I was heartbroken by knowing my son and I worked hard at it… now feeling sad but clearly a sign of bravery, courage and knowing that not all children at that age would do the test. Waste of time?? no, not really, we learnt a lot all the way, we are better off at knowledge and hopeful we will get into a good school. Discipline is the key, and if we are going to fail, I would rather fail now, fail fast… so that we will be prepared for our next challenges in life… :).

Parent from Kent

My Son Passed the 11+

October 14, 2024

Thank you to everyone who has posted their reality. It has helped and brushed up my thoughts about the 11+. It has helped me prepare on how to handle the situation in whatever the result outcome is, my DS has been really nervous awaiting the result……I felt so sorry.

I didn’t even know much or think of him sitting for the exam (because of the catchment area) until six months (February 2024)before the exam. He said to me, I don’t mind trying it! Yes, good start I wanted him to, so I encouraged him, but let him know that whatever the result, we are good. Trust me he really wants to attend a good secondary school, also didn’t want to disappoint himself or us. He worked really hard.

He started tuition for the 1st time on the 9th of March. It was a bit of struggle, I practised past questions with him and his homework. Honestly, like someone mentioned, had I personally sat the exam, I would have failed the non verbal reasoning no doubt. I learnt some part of it while studying with him.

My DS sat the Bexley 11+ and Kent 11+ in September 2024. The Bexley result was released two days ago and thank God he PASSED. He is sooooo happy, I am too. We are waiting for the Kent result which would be out this week. Hopefully he makes it too.

Whatever school he finds himself, he would excel by God’s grace and with our support.

Thanks to everyone, your stories are a eye opener to the different phase of grammar school experience.

Parent from London

Weasel words

October 1, 2024

I have so many friends waiting for Kent Test results. I feel for them. I still remember the day I got the council email with my daughter’s test verdict. The email said, ‘not suitable for grammar school.’ My daughter took that to mean, ‘You failed. You’re not smart.’

It’s such careful language, isn’t it? People say, ‘you didn’t pass,’ but is that really kinder than using the ‘f’ word? They must hope the children who fail won’t see the truth. It’s a horrible system, and seems impossible to shift. Everyone hates the stress of it, but the reward of a grammar school place for many seems to make them forget the rest.

Kent mum

A sad day for me but this forum helps

October 1, 2024

Today I received my child’s 11 plus exam result. It’s not ‘good’ news. I felt sad considering how hard my child had worked for it. I remembered seeing a gray hair on his head on the exam day, and I felt so guilty and heartbroken that he suffered enormous pressure beforehand and will suffer the results afterwards. I didn’t know how to tell him the outcome as he is still in school, but this forum gives me some insight. Thank you all for sharing your stories and thoughts. Appreciated.

Parent London

Just another day in school

September 30, 2024

When I sat the 11+ 1969 it was just another day in school. No fuss was made we sat the papers and that was it. When the results came out no one opened them, they went straight home to parents. I handed mine to my dad and knew I had not scored the minimum magic number( I would love to have know my score at least) as he said nothing. In school it was discussed with peers what school we were attending in the September and that was it. Practice papers and tuition was unheard of. At no point did I feel a failure. However I did feel the options for a career were very limited either nursing or office work was the choice for females. No one went on to University in my year. If you want to learn you will regardless of where you go for Senior School.

Bucks born and bred.

Discrimination.

September 30, 2024

My twin sister and older brother, were both Grammar School stream , I was Secondary Modern stream, my siblings both attended a very heavily subsidised International Science Fortnight in London, parents of children attending only paid a very small token amount, attendance at the event was not available for Secondary Modern children.

Retired one time School Governor Wiltshire

10 years old - one shot at entrance exam. Too much.

September 24, 2024

Child sat the Trafford entrance exam. Tutoring to pass the exam is now the norm – How does this reduce the attainment gap between children from affluent and less affluent backgrounds?

Many children sit the exam from outside catchment, taking places away from local children.

They have one shot at the exam, meaning a child working at greater depth could have a bad day omntje exam day and be deemed as not grammar material. There is no 12 plus second chance.

Too much pressure at age 10.

Parent

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